Voodoo
by Dixie Dewdrop
Summary: What would be an entertaining way to spend an evening with no electricity if you are Abby, Tony, and Jethro?  This is part of my Here and Now series.
1. Spells

Spells

Gibbs walked into the living room with a kerosene lamp that created distorted shadows of him on the walls. He set it down carefully on the coffee table, and thoughtfully regarded Tony and Abby, who sat curled on the couch.

"All right, this should work until bedtime," he explained.

"Boss," Tony spoke, "remember the last time the power went out the electric company did not get it fixed for hours."

"I realize that, but we have plenty of light with this thing." Gibbs sat down in his usual chair and raised his eyebrows.

"I don't know about that," Abby grumbled. She rearranged herself to sit crosslegged on the sofa and continued, "You still haven't shared a good reason with us why Tony and I can't at least have our own candles."

Worried that Jethro would react irritably to her comment, and not wanting to anger the man, Tony quickly clarified, "She said that all by herself, Boss. I didn't put her up to saying it, so if you get mad, target Baby Girl."

Abby turned a scathing look his way, then threw a pillow in his direction.

"Thank you for sharing that, Tony, and Abby, if you throw anything else, I will make your next few days miserable ones, Young Lady." His tone had changed to his firm paternal one, and he focused his gaze on her expectantly. She nodded her acceptance.

He continued, "For the last time, you two don't get to light anything in the house at all- ever, or for any reason. Why, you ask? My decision might have something to do with the fact that the last time Tony took a lit candle to his room, he managed to set fire to part of the curtain."

Tony's head snapped up guiltily. "Well, Boss, but I…."

"Furthermore," he focused on Abby, "the last time I allowed you to have a candle upstairs, you set fire to those aroma branches or dirt or whatever they were and we didn't get the smell out of the house for a week."

"Gibbs, those were herbs, sage and rosemary mostly, and I just used a few leaves- not whole plants. Quite a number of people believe in the healing power of herbs. You are the only person in the entire world who hasn't heard of herbal therapy, or herbal remedies." Abby defended herself with a scowl.

He ignored the observation and looked around at the living room, awash in a soft semi -illumination. "So, the reason you two do not get the privilege of having candles in your rooms harks back to the fact that I simply do not trust you- at all."

Tony smirked and rubbed his hand through his hair, "Great explanation there, Boss-"

Abby smiled also, but decided to add more to her defense. "You act like it's voodoo or something. It's actually just using natural plants and ingredients from the environment."

Tony leaned forward eagerly, his elbows resting on his legs. "Wouldn't it be wild if we could actually make some voodoo spells?" His childish excitement made Gibbs smile.

"We could give these incredible powers…." Abby's eyes lit and she twirled one of her pigtails. "Like, we could just enhance or embellish qualities of some of the people we know."

Tony sat back and scrunched further into his cushion. "Go for it, Baby Girl!"

Abby laughed, "Ok, so we furtively visit the voodoo woman and get a vial with magic qualities and power, and then we secretly put a drop or two in our target's food or drink."

"I've got it," Tony offered, tapping his forefinger against his forehead. "I know our starter person. So, we go down like nothing is up to autopsy, and stealthily sprinkle the powder or potion or whatever it is into Ducky's cup of tea."

Even Gibbs grinned at that visualization. Enjoying the collaboration, he leaned back in his seat and interlaced his fingers at the back of his head. Seeing Tony and Abby working together, collaborating, always pleased him.

Abby picked up the next part, narrating dramatically. "Though known already as a man of many words, Doctor Mallard suddenly put an all new spin on the word loquacious. First, he developed the power to speed up his spoken delivery. That led him to contend for superiority with the renowned Guiness, in its world record competition and recognition for the fastest talking man in the world. The NCIS hometown favorite, Ducky, won, despite unbelievably stiff competition! Once his name and fame established his superiority, world leaders started calling. Realizing that his speech delivery had no comparison, they fought to hire him to deliver their political speeches, realizing that their future success lay not in the power of the sword, but in the power of the language."

Abby pulled her knees up and wrapped her arms around them before she continued. "Presidents and Monarchs battled each other to win sole control of the good doctor, and their contention quickly turned from military skirmishes to out and out wars. The entire planet battled for Dr. Donald Ducky Mallard, until finally, only two countries were left standing- Scotland and the United States. Citizens of both countries deluged the good doctor with private and public pleas to choose their homeland. Scotland felt the native son should honor it, while America insisted the adopted son have loyalty to it. The good doctor realized with an overwhelming, claustrophobic sadness that sometimes he simply spoke too much. No matter what he said from that point, someone would get hurt. He swore a vow of silence, and never again did he engage in conversation, either with the living or with the dead, from that day forward."

Abby stood up and bowed. "That, my favorite men, is the parody of one Donald, Ducky, Mallard."

Tony and Jethro clapped, and then Tony volunteered. "Ok, let me take the next one." He licked his lips in anticipation and then regarded Abby quizzically, looking for clarification. "We spoof the natural talents, right?"

"Right," Gibbs affirmed instead, propping his elbow on the arm of his chair, then resting his head against his hand.

Tony looked around the room with narrowed eyes, and then faced his audience gleefully. "So, this is Boss, and I say that we disguise the concoction in one of his innumerable cups of java."

He grinned at Jethro and adopted the voice of a television newscaster.

"The potent Gibbs stare known throughout the NCIS agency increased a hundred fold after a sip of his coffee early one morning. Accustomed to his incredible talent already, no one found it amiss that he used his lethal stare for instantaneous behavior modification. However, out in the field that day he stopped a fleeing fugitive in his tracks, mesmerizing him in one spot until the team could apply handcuffs. His next feat occurred as the team made its way to the car with the prisoner in tow. Sounds of police sirens grew louder and louder and in the distance Jethro Gibbs witnessed a car attempting to flee police. As the suspect got closer Boss aimed a Gibbs stare its way, right through the windshield. That took care of the problem, because the suspect hit the brakes and slid to the side of the road, parked, put his hands above his head, and waited for the officers to take him into custody."

Tony held his arms up to demonstrate, then renewed the satire. "It impressed the witnesses on the street, and they ran up to question him, but Special Agent Gibbs refused to answer and the team returned to headquarters instead. Later that day he stood in the cash register section of a supermarket interviewing the manager, who had the unhappy experience of discovering a murdered Marine on the store's doorstep early that morning. The volume of noise in the store increased as the clock ticked, and preschoolers in the checkout lanes increasingly staged tantrums to obtain candy within their reach at the checkout sections, despite the negative responses of the parents.

The manager had an unbelievably more difficult time of having his answers heard above the meltdowns of the little ones. Then Jethro Gibbs took matters into his own capable hands. He trained his steely gaze on one checkout lane and then another, not stopping until every little one regarded him and instantly became stunned into silence. Their parents looked the superman over with both pleasure and gratitude."

Abby laughed out loud at that, and Tony smiled at her joy. He leaned over and pulled one of her pigtails before resuming the tale.


	2. Potions

Potions

"In the next three days he rendered participants in a gang fight speechless, halted a prison riot, and soothed a menagerie of excitable zoo animals. Word of his incomparable power had spread so far that the President of the United States called him personally, as well as leaders of all of the power nations. They begged to enlist his services to thwart opposition or uprisings, and since he was a man of principle, he complied.

The enormity of his power weighed on Gibbs, though, and he began to question whether he wanted the responsibility his talent generated. The final straw came about when he attended a major league baseball game. In the ninth inning the pitcher threw a fast ball and inadvertently looked up and caught his glance. He froze, which caused the rest of his ball team to look up and fall under the spell as well. The opposing team, with no one to hinder them, blew the bases and won the game. That incredible incident troubled the Boss so deeply that from that day forward, he wore sunglasses anytime he ventured outdoors to hide his gifted eyes. Inside, he adopted the habit of never making eye contact with anyone."

Abby and Gibbs looked shocked at that change of events, and Tony concluded. "That, dear family, was all she wrote."

The audience smiled and clapped then, and Tony stood up and bowed deeply.

The two younger ones looked to Gibbs expectantly. He scanned the living room to see what had caught their interest. Finally it dawned on him that they expected him to speak next.

Finally, he rubbed his chin thoughtfully and shared, "Well, you have taken care of Ducky and me, so that just leaves the fate of the powers of you two."

"Ooh!" Abby squealed excitedly, "Pick me, Gibbs, pick me!"

Tony waved his hand in the air and contradicted, "You don't want to focus on her, Boss, you want to star your senior field agent!"

Gibbs looked from one to the other and leaned forward again, resting his arms on his legs. "Actually, I plan to pick both of you." He pointed with a forefinger, indicating both of them. "Think you can handle that?"

They exchanged questioning glances with each other, then nodded assent eagerly.

He smirked. "Well all right, let me start. All of NCIS realizes that the great Abby and Tony have extensive knowledge of the entertainment arts, Tony with movies and Abby with music. Therefore, with the addition of a few drops of potion, both find themselves under a voodoo spell of incomparable strength."

Gibbs paused here to gauge their reactions. Both watched him eagerly, with barely restrained excitement, Abby's eyes wide, and Tony grinning.

He continued. "Nothing would have happened to highlight their talent in a noteworthy way had it not been for the fact that the two decided to participate in a trivia night at one of the local clubs. Both topped the leader board in their respective subjects, and the entire club urged them to go ahead and compete in a district competition. They did, and once again both won. What an enviable victory that was for them! After that they spent every available free moment away competing for bragging rights. They turned into local celebrities, then state celebrities, and finally all of the United States could tell you who they were the moment their faces or names appeared in the media."

He glanced at them again, and they most definitely approved of the story. During his narration they had scooted to the middle of the sofa. Snuggled together, they waited wide eyed for his next words.

"Finally the time came that their superiority had nowhere else to go in the United States. They then decided to corner the world market. It didn't take long before they established themselves as the unstoppable champs of global entertainment trivia, and extroverts that they were, they enjoyed all of the limelight and the prestige. However, once they had proved their proficiency in those genres, people began to pressure them to extend their expertise to politics, or physics, or chemistry, or any number of fields. Finding it hard to say no, they found themselves not respected for their attributes, but rather used and manipulated to satisfy the needs of others."

Gibbs paused and regarded them. "Finally one day the two cut off the phones, ignored any summons, and locked themselves into an office to dissect their fame and their future. Suddenly it seemed pretty obvious to them that they had lost their joy, and that they did not want the heavy responsibilities of solving all of the world's problems by themselves under any circumstance. They made a pact that from that time forward no one would ever hear them make anything but general comments about entertainment, except for their NCIS family. It made them realize that no one single person, or pair of people, should ever be the sole purveyors of so much knowledge. At that turning point, they conceded that brilliance did not necessarily signal something great."

With that ending, he looked from one to the other, and they both burst into applause.

A minute or two later Tony spoke up eagerly, anxious to keep the fun going. "Boss, let's lampoon the rest of our colleagues. We could add Fornell, and Slacks…."

Abby interrupted him, speaking just as excitedly, "Oh yes, that would be hysterical! We could spoof Timmy's computer techno talent or takeoff on Ziva's hand to hand combat skills, or…"

She didn't get the chance to finish her list.

Gibbs, shaking his head from side to side, held up his hand as a signal for silence.

Abby popped a hand over her mouth and both she and Tony looked questioningly at him, waiting for his explanation.

He stood and stretched leisurely, then made his way to the sofa to kiss first Abby, then Tony, on their heads.

"Let's take a raincheck on the rest of the parodies, you two. Right now I want to go down to the basement and work for an hour or so, and obviously, this kerosene lamp will join me."

He motioned them to stand also, and they obeyed. Then stooping down to grab the lamp he pointed towards the upper story. "So, that means the three of us will head upstairs. I intend to put you both to bed so I can go work on the boat." He made his way to the stairs.

"Gibbs!" Abby protested, following behind him. "This is so wrong making us go to bed. Let us stay up with you please. It's not our fault that the electricity is out."

Tony chimed in, "Yeah Boss, you know we used voodoo in out satire stories. We'll be afraid to go to sleep, worried about spells, so why are you rushing our bedtime?"

They had reached the landing, and Gibbs pointed to Abby's room, then to Tony's. "No, let me contribute this postscript. I am putting a voodoo spell on both of you right now, turning you into a forensic scientist who wants to sleep, and a senior field agent who desires some night night time. Go, now-"

The two rolled their eyes at each other in the semi darkness but headed into their rooms nonetheless.

As Jethro turned to make his way down the stairs he heard Abby mutter, "When we parody you again…."

Tony finished in a low voice, "you'll find yourself a micro managing dictator!"

Gibbs grinned and headed for the basement.


End file.
